“Happy” Meals
By Stacey | Posted on January 19, 2010 | No Comments
We are very blessed that my husband’s workplace is only a few minutes down the road. Therefore, most of the time he is able to come home and eat lunch with us. It’s really nice to see him, even though he’s usually kind of distracted and rushed. It gives him a break, and a decent meal. It gives the kids a chance to hug him, and tell him what’s gone on so far that day.
The other day right after lunch, my three-year-old daughter said, “This is a happy meal!” Of course, I was delighted at her happiness and said, “I’m so glad you’re happy.” Later my fifteen-year-old son brought up the fact that most kids think “Happy Meals” come from a drive through. I thought about that and was so amused.
This little girl lives in a world where she is surrounded by people who love her and watch out for her (sometimes read “boss her”). She has at least one parent immediately available to her almost all the time unless we’re out together. She is warm, safe, and regularly fed. She climbs in clean sheets at night, with clean jammies on. She has a big sister right near by if she’s scared at night. There’s always something going on around here to join in on. There are usually potential playmates available. Even Daddy has been known to play dollhouse! And this day, after a lunch with her family, she stood up on the bench and told me she had just had a happy meal.
What was so great about that meal in particular? I don’t know. The lunch fare wasn’t special. No exceptional things had transpired. She was just happy about having shared a meal with all the faces that fill her world everyday. That’s the kind of happy meal I can afford, and the kind I can feel good about providing. We all have so much to be thankful for. I’m glad my little girl told me about her happy meal.
Just say “YES!”
By Mark | Posted on July 25, 2009 | 3 Comments
Phew, just got back in from playing basketball with the kids….it was a blast.
They asked me to play earlier today but I was too tired so I took a nap. OK, yeah, I really was tired, but the truth is I just didn’t feel like it. Being tired was just an excuse. It sounded better than I don’t want to.
When you’re a good hearted little boy and your dad says he’s too tired, it feels sad, but its hard to argue with him. Instead you just wilt a little bit inside and try to figure out how to go on with your life. If that happens too many times, some kids just stop asking. The flower inside them dies and its a ton of work to try to grow a new one later on. Most of the time it never happens.
Anyway, after dinner I felt guilty about not going out earlier. I believe the word I heard in my head was slacker. Yeah, I was and I knew it so I ventured outside to the driveway. The first thing out of the kids mouths was DAD! ARE YOU GONNA PLAY BASKETBALL WITH US!?! Like the domestic superstar I am, I mumbled Well, we can shoot some hoops… not sure about a real game. What a schmuck. (can I say that here?) Oh well, its true, I really hadn’t turned my heart yet. I was still being lazy.
Awww, c’mon Dad… pleeeease can we play a game?
Ok, that did it. The pressure was really on and the path of least resistance had switched from no to yes. I was already out there. They were already out there. What-da-ya-know the basketball and hoop were already out there. It was either give in and actually play a game or keep saying no, no, no and face the visible wilting in the eyes and smiles. I couldn’t do it. I gave in and said Ok let’s play a real game!
From then on… it was awesome. I got sweaty. I love getting sweaty. I taught them how to pass a ball the right way. I love teaching them stuff. I stole the ball and blocked a few shots. (I let a few shots get through – that was more fun). We had a blast and they spent the rest of the evening telling their mom about it.
I’m such an idiot sometimes. Why did I waste all that time? I LOVE playing basketball. I’ve always loved it. Ugh.
We’ll no big speeches or sermons here. Maybe I’ll say “Yes!” earlier next time.
Beautiful Biscuits
By Stacey | Posted on July 10, 2009 | 3 Comments
Today for breakfast we had cottage cheese and cinnamon raisin biscuits. It was perfect! It was raining outside and it seemed just right to pull those biscuits out of the oven and serve them to the kids. (Hubby was already off to work.) Several years ago I got a great cookbook that had a very basic biscuit recipe in it. I have used that one recipe more than any other in the whole cookbook! (Remember the old days, when you had to have a cookbook to get recipes because the Internet didn’t exist yet?)
Biscuits are a great addition to any meal. They are economical and customize-able. You can adjust the recipe to accommodate dietary needs and preferences as well as the theme of the meal. We usually trade out some or all of the flour for organic wheat or spelt flour. We buy this in 25 pound bags for less than a dollar a pound! We use aluminum-free baking powder instead of the kind you can buy at Wal-Mart which contains aluminum. Instead of butter or shortening, I use organic plain yogurt. And I always use the drop biscuits option which simply calls for more milk so you plop dough instead of having to knead and cut your biscuits. Sprinkling a little cornmeal on your pan will help keep the biscuits from sticking.
From your basic recipe and dietary adaptations, the sky is the limit! Try one of the following additions:
- Raisins, cinnamon and sweetener of your choice
- Shredded cheese and onion powder
- Shredded cheese and taco-type seasonings
- Dill weed
- Rosemary, basil, oregano and garlic powder
- Seeds or nuts with or without sweetener of your choice
- Oats instead of some of the flour
Cooking from scratch can seem daunting when you have a house full of people to take care of! Who should deserve to buy premade foods and mixes more than you? But honestly, you will feed your family higher quality food at better prices if you are willing to “make your own”. A great thing to do with some or all of your children is have a mix-making session. Measure out all your dry ingredients into large Ziploc bags or left over containers and label “biscuit mix”. With our family of 8, we have to double the typical recipe. You can whip out 4 or 5 mixes in no time. The kids love to measure out the flour, salt and baking powder and dump them into the containers. You will love the convenience of pulling out your homemade mix when you want to make breakfast or a tasty side dish. Your family will love the fresh, hot biscuits.
Salad Is For More Than Bunnies (And Dieters)
By Stacey | Posted on July 8, 2009 | 2 Comments
Tonight’s menu: Salad bar! Have you ever tried this at your house? There’s almost nothing that can’t be put on a salad. Tonight, we’ll have lettuce, cucumbers, red (it’s really purple) onion, raw sunflower seeds, raw pumpkin seeds, croutons, shredded cheese, boiled eggs chopped, and strips of natural beef lunchmeat.
If you love the rich higher calorie dressings, there are plenty to choose from. Newman’s Own brand dressings impress our family because there are a bunch of yummy flavors and they really do have nicer ingredient lists. We can buy these at Wal-Mart. We also buy those spray-on kind of dressings that don’t really compare to “regular” salad dressing but help you hold down your calories. At this point in my life (and weight) I’d rather eat more salad and toppings with skimpy dressing than less food with luxurious dressing!
Salad can only be considered a meal at our house if the lettuce becomes the base for a vast assortment of other veggies, crunchies (like seeds, croutons, broken pretzels or tortilla chips), protein (like eggs, beans, meats or cheeses), and dressing. I have had some delicious salads with fruit added in, but that is not an opinion shared by everyone at my house. Even pasta or rice can be delicious mixed in with all the other salad goodies.
This is a great meal to serve during the summer months when gardens are flourishing. But we have salad with toppings year ’round. The possibilities are endless depending on the options you provide. You could have a Mexican, Asian, or pizza themed salad. Be creative! If you provide enough protein options for the salad, you should be able to satisfy people until the next meal, or at least the next snack!! (Did I mention we’ll probably eat popcorn tonight while we listen to The Voyage of the Dawn Treader?)
The Power of a Focused Mom and Dad
By Stacey | Posted on July 8, 2009 | No Comments
“Stay focused!” is something my children hear regularly from me. It seems like when it’s school time, chore time, or transition times (like before bed), our children have an amazing capacity to socialize with one another. Sometimes it’s almost painful to tell them to stop talking or playing because I’m so glad they enjoy each other and are friends. Realistically, though, there comes a time to buckle down and just get stuff done.
It is an important character trait to be able to stay focused and persevere in the tasks we do. And yet, we as parents have to balance our task list with the never-ending task of nurturing other humans. I could often use a little of my kids’ ability to set aside the task at hand and just focus on the people around me for a minute. How about you?
Spousie and children NEED us to be able to stop sometimes and really focus on a new discovery, misplaced item, trick on the trampoline, problem needing a solution, reinactment of a scene from “Curious George”. . . or whatever. When I am being talked to in the middle of something else I’m doing, which is often, I try to LOOK at the person talking to me and give eye contact. I’m not perfect at this, by any means. But this simple tool accomplishes so much in the way of communicating genuine interest and love to the person talking.
This is not to say that children should come to expect that they will be the center of your attention at any time for any reason. No one enjoys children or adults that try to dominate every conversation or situation they are a part of. Teach your children to interrupt respectfully and discreetly if Mom or Dad is talking to another person. But when you are doing something like peeling veggies, or using the computer, unless you’re on a time deadline, you probably have the minutes necessary to connect with the person desiring your focus. Put down your book, look up from the laundry pile, pause at the dishwasher. LOOK at the person talking to you and focus. Show genuine interest in what they say and when appropriate, make your eyes sparkle and smile really big.
Sometimes More is More
By Stacey | Posted on June 17, 2009 | 1 Comment
I am always telling my family and others to get rid of unnecessary extras. The less you have to manage, the less time managing your stuff takes. Since there’s more to life than managing things, we should always be ready to do with the least that is needed to make our life work. Well, usually. Over the years I have decided there is a list of exceptions to the “less is more” rule.
- Groceries, soaps and paper products: Within the constraints of your budget and good planning regarding expiration dates, etc., it’s practical and useful to have extras of food, all kinds of soaps and paper goods. We have had way too many close calls on toilet paper. You know, when you go to rob a couple rolls from one bathroom to supply the other and realize you are holding the LAST PRECIOUS ROLL. Enough said. There are lots of people these days storing up food and the like for various reasons. You can adopt some of their techniques or create your own strategy to begin creating a surplus on your own garage shelves. Practicality, not fear, can be the motivation.
- Diapers, wipes, baby care essentials: Same as above except trade the LAST PRECIOUS ROLL for the LAST PRECIOUS DIAPER! Yes, dampened paper towels can replace wipes in a pinch, but wipes are undeniable handy. Also, make sure you have an extra of your favorite diaper cream or you and spousie are going to be deciding who holds the crying child with miserable bumster while the other makes a run to the store (usually when it’s dark or raining).
- Vitamins, medicines: Our family has a cabinet stocked with vitamins and natural supplements the way some people have a full medicine cabinet. When sickness strikes, our immune-boosters are ready to go.
- Bandaids: We have six kids, three are boys, and we allow running in the house. Any other questions?
- Hairbrushes and nail clippers: This may just be a personal quirk of our family, but we are always looking for hairbrushes and nail clippers. ”Don’t you people ever put anything back after you use it?” you legitimately ask. I’ll be honest, sometimes yes, sometimes, no. We’re working on it. If one of the girls brings me a brush and I sit in the kitchen or living room and fix 1-2 girls’ hair, I sometimes lay it down so I can begin school or whatever right away.
- Silverware: Dishes are like laundry and sometimes even the best homemakers get behind. An extra set (or two, or three) is not hard to store and can be such a blessing when the last meal’s dishes didn’t get cleaned and dried for one reason or another. And how are you going to host a gathering with your favorite large family if you don’t have a huge amount of silverware?
- Bowls and Plates: We have ceramic tile in the kitchen, so we lose a bowl or plate about once a month! Even if this is not the case at your house, having extra dishes on hand can be so nice! My focus has been on acquiring extra bowls because we regularly buy paper plates. If there are no real plates clean, paper is always there. But disposable bowls are more expensive, and so we rarely buy them. If we eat cereal or oatmeal for breakfast, and soup for lunch, it’s really nice to have a double set of bowls. I have Corelle dishes in a beige color so I can buy extras for about $3 each at the store and replace them when needed. Your taste may not be suited to any Corelle styles, but if it is, I highly recommend them. They are lightweight, resist breakage (except on my ceramic kitchen tiles!) and can be replaced piece by piece.
- Children’s books: We LOVE books at our house. We love all kinds of books, but I want to focus on children’s story books here. We have some that are almost a part of the family because they have been read and reread to our children. Now our olders can read them to the youngers. We usually acquire our books at garage sales, used homeschool curriculum sales, used book stores, or for gifts. The department store, Kohl’s, has been selling some amazing hardcover books for only $5 each! If you go there anyway, look for displays near the front doors. Books are instant cuddling and interaction tools. Grab one or ten, whatever you have time for, and call some or all of the children! You can read word for word, or improvise with silly additions. You can pause and ask questions, or use dramatic voices. We have almost always had a daily reading time with our little ones before their afternoon naps. When children are older, they love to hear chapter books read aloud. A good story is just as good as a good movie, and the whole family can sit in the living room and do things with their hands (like sew, sketch or color) while one person reads.
- Peelers, hand-held can openers: Peeling goes a lot faster with more than one person doing it! Employ your eager helpers in the kitchen and let them join your peeling or can opening party.
- Salt and pepper shaker/napkin holders: If you serve your food or part of your food from the table (vs. buffet-style on a counter or bar) meals will go much smoother if people can reach what they need quickly. In addition to 2 sets of salt and peppers, you might consider putting out multiples of condiments or butter.
- Large stainless steel mixing and serving bowls: I couldn’t function without my 2 huge bowls. I mix in them, wash veggies and fruits in them, and serve in them. We try to avoid putting hot things in plastic bowls, so these are perfect for mixing my hot rice with other ingredients to create a casserole.
- Toasters: I’m sure you’ve already thought of this, or have had to resort to the old-fashioned cookie sheet and oven method.
- Cloths for kitchen and bathroom: You’ll never have to do without, no matter how behind on laundry you are. You could always dry off on a clean pillowcase or sheet. (Yes, I’ve done this! Will you still be my friend?!) But there’s no easy replacement for a cloth!
- Undies and socks: This is the same thought as the cloths above. When the going gets tough, having extra undies and socks means that even if most everything else is staring at you from the dirty laundry mountain, your family members can at least bathe and put on clean undies, even if their outer wear could use a wash. (Can anyone else relate to having the laundry get that bad? For us it usually follows days of everyone being sick and Mom and Dad just trying to keep everyone comfortable and hydrated and “vitamin-ed”.)
- Pillow cases and sheets: Children provide us a host of opportunities to change sheets: bed-wetting, leaky diapers, sickness, etc. Be prepared with extra sheets and cases, even if they don’t match! In a perfect world, we would strip all the beds, walk straight to the washer, wash and dry all the sheets, and replace them on the same day. I don’t live in a perfect world, and maybe you don’t either.
- Pillows: Bed-wetting has not been a big problem on the whole, but one thing I’ll tell you. Pillows often ended up getting wet when the sheets did! I never could understand how this happened, but we were glad to have clean, dry pillows waiting in the wings. We won’t even talk about all of our bouts with stomach flu or bloody noses. . .
- Blankets: See above. These are also great for tents and impromptu picnics on the living room floor.
- Crayons: Siblings color together better when they don’t have to grab for the only red, or orange, or black, etc.
Buy your extras a little at a time. Your budget and your spousie will react less strongly.
Mashed Potatoes
By Stacey | Posted on June 13, 2009 | No Comments
It just so happens that my husband and children LOVE homemade mashed potatoes. They make my husband feel cared for, complete. He actually said he would choose homemade mashed potatoes over a steak! And this man really likes steak! So all the peeling and chopping are worth it. Making homemade mashed potatoes can feel like an irritation to me at times. When I was a child, my mom found hers in a box, and they were so easy to make! But as with so many things in the life of a family, giving a little reaps a lot of reward. So, the peeler and I spend a lot of time together.
On the practical side, mashed potatoes are very versatile. They are also inexpensive and filling. Here’s a few ways we’ve enjoyed them at our house:
- Thinned to potato soup – can be embellished with corn, cheese, celery, onion
- As a base or topping for a chicken or beef potpie-type filling
- As a base for chili
- As a base for taco meat – can be embellished with the typical taco toppings
- As a base for meatloaf-flavored meat mixture
- As a tasty side dish, especially when the kids may not love the entree’
Happy mashing! By the way, children LOVE to make mashed potatoes too. Just don’t let them lift the mixer out while it’s still on. . .
Don’t You Just Love It?
By Stacey | Posted on June 12, 2009 | No Comments
There are many, many obvious challenges about raising a large family. I won’t even endeavor to list them all here. Most of you know them firsthand. But amidst all those challenges, there are some amazing things to delight in. Here are just a few. As you read, mentally add your own ideas to my list and thank the Creator for them. Also, go tell your spousie and children how glad you are to be sharing this life with them.
- Anyone hugging or kissing anyone else
- People dragging themselves out of cozy beds because they forgot to hug/kiss/say goodnight to so-and-so
- Siblings working together to accomplish tasks
- Mom and Dad smooching only to find 1-3 kiddos slithering in between for some falling sugar
- A million colors and sizes of everything: undies, socks, shoes, toothbrushes, PJs, bath towels, bath robes, favorite blankets, favorite dolls/stuffed animals, bicycles, musical instruments, comforters, etc.
- People choosing to share their things
- Siblings giving up free time to play something “beneath them”
- Olders holding youngers
- Youngers copying olders
- Conversations, talking, chatting, and story-telling
- Siblings watching out for each other
- Genuine rejoicing from all as one learns to ride a bike, loses a tooth, or plays a recital piece
- Lots of cute feet – line them up in order some time and take a picture
- More birthdays to celebrate
- Wonderful, raucous noise
- Lots of breathing in the house at night
- Crowded couches
- Older kids to help you remember things from your younger children’s early years
- Older children teaching your younger children things you taught them “when they were young”
- Younger children teaching your older children things they should have learned by now!
- Walking in public and having people smile at your family
- Watching the children walk somewhere holding hands
- Hearing the children express love or approval to one another
- Watching the children comfort one another
- Walking behind your brood somewhere and realizing all those precious people live at YOUR HOUSE
You’re My Favorite. . .
By Stacey | Posted on May 30, 2009 | No Comments
We have friends that have more children than we do. They are always juggling more than we are, and it’s been interesting to watch them from the sidelines. One day, the husband of the family was sitting on our couch talking with his 4th child out of 5 or 6 at the time. The child was probably about 2 or 3 and his daddy was making the most of what would have been an empty moment. ”You’re my favorite Timothy in the whole world,” our friend said to his captive audience. I was greatly intrigued by what I had just heard. At first, I inwardly chuckled. ”Yes,” I thought, “that’s the best you can do with so many kids to raise.” I went on with what I had to do next. Days or weeks later, however, I found myself saying that to one of my children. My heart had softened toward the sentiment. I had even become excited about it! Whoever I was blessed enough to be relating with at that moment was truly, really my favorite Whoever in the whole world! I had a simple way to communicate a profound truth to each of my children. You are individually loved and enjoyed and NO ONE else can take your place.
Don’t feel guilty for bringing your children into a family of more than the average number of children.
Do work hourly to show love for and enjoyment of each person in your family – don’t forget your spousie.
Do collect an arsenal of words and actions that can convey love to each person in your family.
Use this tool if it works for you. I put the words “You’re my favorite. . . in the whole wide world” to music. Now, my children often sing it back to me and I get to be someone’s favorite too!
Sometimes Less Is More
By Stacey | Posted on May 30, 2009 | 1 Comment
I wanted to share some of my “less is more” list with you. Read on and you’ll see what I mean.
Less is more:
- Clothing – you do laundry constantly anyway. Save some of the brain juice you’ve been using trying to store all those extra clothes your kids don’t really need. Give the extras to other families, sell them, or donate them at a local charity. But what about saving them for hand-me-downs? I feel your pain. You look at a shirt or dress and say, “Suzie doesn’t need this but Janie may when she gets to this size.” My best advice is keep a few things over and above Suzie’s needs and give the rest away. Even if Suzie ruins a few things, you’ll still have about the same number of items left that you dressed her in for Janie to use later. You will have forgotten about the item in question when Janie gets to this size anyway. And if you have a network of caring friends and family, you’re likely to have more stuff coming your way for Janie in the future too. Don’t get confused here. I’m not saying we don’t save clothes to pass down later. We have lived with an army of plastic storage containers filled with waiting hand-me-downs in our garage for years. I’m saying that it’s helpful to trim down the quantity of clothes you maintain in the closets for the current season for each child.
- Toys – figure out which ones have true play value and get rid of the rest. I’ll write about our enduring favorites in a later post. Find some friends to trade toys with to brighten up your supply without spending money. When your children tire of them, just sanitize them and send them home!